Mommy Mack Update #2

So today I'm doing a tiny update on Rhys and a bigger update on me. Rhys is still working very hard at sitting up and is getting so close. He got a new rocking chair that he loves and he also got a bumbo chair and another fold up chair to help him learn to sit up. He is still loving his oatmeal once a day. I also bought a carrier as shown in the picture and he clearly enjoys it. He has gotten to a point where he doesn't want to be alone and I have to hold him all the time so it has definitely come in handy. He is also in a new habbit of waking up after bedtime. He goes to sleep for a bit sometimes even an hour or so and then he wakes up and needs to be rocked back to sleep. If this is what his 4 month sleep regression looks like then I will gladly take it because it definitely could be a lot worse than him waking up once and needing to be put back to sleep. I know a lot of babies that go through a sleep regression wake up multiple times a night. I'm hoping that never happens but there is still time for it to. One other thing I have noticed is he has started teething quite badly and his teeth really bug him during the day. Luckily, he doesn't wake up at night with his teeth bothering him, or maybe that's why he wakes up after bedtime..? The weird part of his teething is it's his molers that seem to be coming in. He chews most on the bottom right but also the bottom left. It is really starting to hurt when he chews people's fingers but he hasn't quite figured out how to use a teething toy on his own yet. Hopefully his teeth are just moving and they go back down and leave him alone because as far as I know, babies usually get their front teeth first. Maybe I'm wrong. I guess we will find out.

On to my update. I'm definitely feeling a stronger connection with Rhys lately and that makes me happy. But, as usual, I have a reason for writing today. My mom had a day off and therefore was super helpful and gave me time to get some of my own stuff done. The issue I was running into, was when my mom had to go get something done and handed Rhys over to me, he would start screaming and she would have to come back and calm hjm down. It's almost like he was taking strange to me. It was a horrible feeling and to top it off, me feeling bad about it, made it harder to calm him down in the end. I just kept thinking my son liked my mom better than me and that feeling is awful. I love my son to pieces and would do absolutely anything for him. He has no way of showing his love or telling me right now so on days where I can't help him feel safe and comforted, to me it feels like he doesn't love me like I love him. Not to mention how discouraging it is that someone else can calm your child but you can't. It was so hard to remember that it's just the moment. Chances are he was in a comfy position with my mom and then when he moved to me he wasn't anymore. But, it's hard to think that it's something so simple when it looks like something else. It's so easy to look at the situation with the idea that he likes my mom more than me. That doesn't make it true. Like with most things that happen when you have a young child or baby, I had to continually remind myself that it could be something simple. The idea that my son doesn't love me is almost ridiculous. He was part of me for 9 months and I know by the way he looks at me most of the time that he absolutely adores me. But I can't lie and say I'm not a little nervous that he is going to love someone more than me one day. And as an adult he likely will. I don't want to think of that now. I'm sure when the time comes I will be very happy for him but for now, he is my little baby boy.

I have seen that a few people have been reading my blogs and I wanted to say a quick thank you. I know sometimes I rant and my posts seem like ramblings, but that's how I think. I appreciate everyone who reads and I hope you all get something from my posts. Whether it's reassurance or simple entertainment, I hope everyone feels even a tad better after reading my posts. If you found me from TikTok, I have started following everyone back who follows me, so if you don't follow me yet you should and get a follow back, and always feel free to mess me there and interact. I absolutely love hearing from other moms and talking to them. I think I'm going to end here before I ramble too far. I hope everyone has a good day/night, I will try to post again soon.